Yesterday and today is a demarcation line. My first adult me Christmas celebrated partying. I have always been surrounded by the net of family or having a significant other every Christmas, and this year I am by myself - by choice. It's freeing and fun. The first year in 26 years where all those decorations and tree remain unboxed, minimal visiting shops for presents, selectively choosing time allocation. Who knew life could be this good stepping outside of my pre-conceived notions of the holidays?
Clearly, Christmas is not about the material, the exchange of the material to say "I love you;" the need to be with loved ones to feel loved; the doing to please, to be accepted, or in order to.
Last night I got to share with just about every guest how extraordinary their lives truly are and have that kind of conversation live that would open up other wonderful types of conversations. I noticed how folk would stop with all their superficial, learned quick comebacks to look good/funny and welcome having the opportunity of just being free to express what is truly important to them.
I gave and received heart felt hugs, Mary, Vanessa, Eric, John exchanged acknowledgments with me and each other, I met lots of new friends and invited them to the social meet up group. This also was the first time I came home long after 1:00am.
There is a saying in Landmark that after you are transformed the community has to re-adjust their version of you, as you are no longer the triangle they have always seen you as, you are now a circle shape. Last night, I got the feedback that I am seen and presenced as who I say am, and held accountable for being who I say I am, that it is not for myself as much as the richness of other's lives.
Contribution
Making a difference
We owe it to our "creator" to maximize our potential (Oprah Winfrey)
How was your Christmas?
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
Sunday, December 23, 2007
Old Friend
Today, Seehung my middle school friend from Zimbabwe called to wish me the best of the season. She was working through her trials and ailments when I asked her what she loved about where she lived. Her voice perked up, and she went into how peaceful it was to be surrounded by nature. I then went into the acknowledgment series with her and got to thank her for being such a wonderful mom, wife, creative, resourceful woman.
Seehung in turn acknowledged me and I heard that she is learning who I really am and that she never really knew me growing up. I love the questions and frames we get to generate conversations in because it's truly about getting to know the other person in a whole different way. Instead of allowing someone to spiral downwards in their speaking - give them a space where they get to see possibilities and celebrate themselves and others.
She now has the responsibility of sharing the acknowledgment series with her husband, sons, and everyone she cares about. To know someone forever, and then be known by them differently - what a gift.
happy holidays is about more than material
Seehung in turn acknowledged me and I heard that she is learning who I really am and that she never really knew me growing up. I love the questions and frames we get to generate conversations in because it's truly about getting to know the other person in a whole different way. Instead of allowing someone to spiral downwards in their speaking - give them a space where they get to see possibilities and celebrate themselves and others.
She now has the responsibility of sharing the acknowledgment series with her husband, sons, and everyone she cares about. To know someone forever, and then be known by them differently - what a gift.
happy holidays is about more than material
Saturday, December 22, 2007
Chill Time
It's grand to be home, home, home and plan on working on the mundane. This past week is great with finals and sending kids home at 11:30am. The ideal work day is 8:00am till 11:30 am with the rest to catch up and play. Tons of grading.
Reading through student acknowledgment of semester growth and learning is rewarding. Many said they can draw what they now see as opposed to what they know - my goal for them. The majority did well in their finals and the lower cognitive level students had their cheat sheets to refer to (as did the class). The conversation of cheating was eliminated and students understood those papers were like their security blanket as they pretty much were sick of the information and were ready to just spit it out and be done.
Yesterday, I caught up with old friends from Mohave MS, the old school. That was a great reality check - truly love my life and where I am with the older kids. May miss some teachers and their cheer, laughter, and good will, and happy to be at the high school level. Day before did a presentation for the school about how great the art department is and invite them to sign up for arts. Lots of hands waiving at me as I stood on stage. Way cool. It was an opportune time to walk around and hug lots of old teacher friends too. Loved that day. Brian said the kids were happy to see me again and enjoyed the presentation.
Everything unfolds exactly the way it needs to.
Part of our homework is to rectify integrity. When doing so it becomes obvious where there is an out in integrity, and it's obvious when it's everywhere. There is a distinct discomfort because I cannot close my eyes and pretend it does not exist as I have in the past. Now I get to step up to the plate and clean up the mess.
Integrity issues: gossiping, misunderstanding intent and labeling negatives, being late, anything related to lack of follow through on my word given to others and myself.
Home, it's really good to be home and catch up
be complete with myself first
so I can be complete with others
Reading through student acknowledgment of semester growth and learning is rewarding. Many said they can draw what they now see as opposed to what they know - my goal for them. The majority did well in their finals and the lower cognitive level students had their cheat sheets to refer to (as did the class). The conversation of cheating was eliminated and students understood those papers were like their security blanket as they pretty much were sick of the information and were ready to just spit it out and be done.
Yesterday, I caught up with old friends from Mohave MS, the old school. That was a great reality check - truly love my life and where I am with the older kids. May miss some teachers and their cheer, laughter, and good will, and happy to be at the high school level. Day before did a presentation for the school about how great the art department is and invite them to sign up for arts. Lots of hands waiving at me as I stood on stage. Way cool. It was an opportune time to walk around and hug lots of old teacher friends too. Loved that day. Brian said the kids were happy to see me again and enjoyed the presentation.
Everything unfolds exactly the way it needs to.
Part of our homework is to rectify integrity. When doing so it becomes obvious where there is an out in integrity, and it's obvious when it's everywhere. There is a distinct discomfort because I cannot close my eyes and pretend it does not exist as I have in the past. Now I get to step up to the plate and clean up the mess.
Integrity issues: gossiping, misunderstanding intent and labeling negatives, being late, anything related to lack of follow through on my word given to others and myself.
Home, it's really good to be home and catch up
be complete with myself first
so I can be complete with others
Sunday, December 9, 2007
Homework
The homework is to ask people in our community what it is they love about living in their community. What's interesting is their response.
The majority of the time, they go into glowing speeches of what they love, love, love about living in the area, working, or studying at that place. I have one occasion where the gentleman could not find one thing he liked about Arizona. So I had him talk about where he loved to live and be in, and why he moved, and what about the choices he made. I learned so much about him and that he was the owner of the fast food Hawaiiin place I frequent often.
From this conversation what I get is the opportunity to just listen, validate, listen, and give reflective listening as the person is so into what they have to say and I get to hear their love for what's important to them.
During my conversation yesterday with Janet, I also saw where I try to focus on the positive can invalidate someone's comments - especially when they are busy making wrong. So I checked myself, heard her out, just being present and listening. Allowing her to fully self-express however that is for her. I was then able to listen for something else that could be said, that was relevant, insightful, and far better accepted than by my jumping in to re-direct the conversation to a more positive slant.
What I love about living in my neighborhood are my neighbours who are friendly, chatty, and will always stop to say "Hi," and there is shared history. My kids at my school are just the best - squirrelly sometimes, never malicious with malintent, always wanting to be the best for themselves and aiming to create good results. There is never a dull moment and I am always energized by their presence. Yeah... I could go on
So what is it that you love about where you live, your community?
The majority of the time, they go into glowing speeches of what they love, love, love about living in the area, working, or studying at that place. I have one occasion where the gentleman could not find one thing he liked about Arizona. So I had him talk about where he loved to live and be in, and why he moved, and what about the choices he made. I learned so much about him and that he was the owner of the fast food Hawaiiin place I frequent often.
From this conversation what I get is the opportunity to just listen, validate, listen, and give reflective listening as the person is so into what they have to say and I get to hear their love for what's important to them.
During my conversation yesterday with Janet, I also saw where I try to focus on the positive can invalidate someone's comments - especially when they are busy making wrong. So I checked myself, heard her out, just being present and listening. Allowing her to fully self-express however that is for her. I was then able to listen for something else that could be said, that was relevant, insightful, and far better accepted than by my jumping in to re-direct the conversation to a more positive slant.
What I love about living in my neighborhood are my neighbours who are friendly, chatty, and will always stop to say "Hi," and there is shared history. My kids at my school are just the best - squirrelly sometimes, never malicious with malintent, always wanting to be the best for themselves and aiming to create good results. There is never a dull moment and I am always energized by their presence. Yeah... I could go on
So what is it that you love about where you live, your community?
Sunday, December 2, 2007
Stories
Something in the writing down of everything you believe to be true, setting it aside, and reading it impassionately the next day gives rise to insight. Yesterday, everything I wrote about the curriculum, what kids want - that's all a story. What happens is there is a curriculum, it needs to be covered, there is an allocated time to cover it, and it gets taught. That's it. Everything else around it is a story. When I took on the job, that's the agreement I inherited - it's part of me being professional, delivering the goods the way it was designed.
Yesterday, we had to deal with an issue of integrity, what happened, what I said, what I didn't say, what I decided, without the story around it. Amazing how I was soooo stopped because all I wanted was to give the juicy details of the story - it was hilarious. We had to run through the process a couple of times and at the end there was nothing. No emotion, I had said everything I wanted to at the time of the incident - without the story, and in that moment I was complete.
No stories
in the end, there is a whole bunch of peace around the incident because into someone else's listening I got to say everything I wanted to say and never said. What that does for me now - I am not triggered by someone making a promise, entering into an agreement. I can see it as possibility for trust and its fulfullment and completion.
.... and its all happily ever after
Yesterday, we had to deal with an issue of integrity, what happened, what I said, what I didn't say, what I decided, without the story around it. Amazing how I was soooo stopped because all I wanted was to give the juicy details of the story - it was hilarious. We had to run through the process a couple of times and at the end there was nothing. No emotion, I had said everything I wanted to at the time of the incident - without the story, and in that moment I was complete.
No stories
in the end, there is a whole bunch of peace around the incident because into someone else's listening I got to say everything I wanted to say and never said. What that does for me now - I am not triggered by someone making a promise, entering into an agreement. I can see it as possibility for trust and its fulfullment and completion.
.... and its all happily ever after
Saturday, December 1, 2007
Depth vs Breadth
Yesterday was short since it was Pep Rally and Amy came for her last observation. In the role of art teacher I am always writing a letter of reference, and I now keep a copy template for modification. I wonder if there is such a thing as "too generous" in what I give out. I had that conversation with my students in that I am generous as a middle school art teacher and my transition to high school teacher needs to be re-adjusted. I will take their finished products to Susan and have her help me adjust how to grade at a high school level. Their work through my eyes is simply amazing, I see them as incredible students who allow themselves to stretch beyond their comfort zone, and have the space to do so. They earn solid "A"s. I like the view that you walk into the classroom (life) with an "A" and everything after is living into it.
Friday, every class had "one minute no talk time." I will think about how can I have them learn how to self-monitor, or what is it that has them more off task than on? What is it about the content or teaching that is not feeding them - do I need to build in share time in a talking about what you are learning time, like a mini-positive feedback thing?
The Curriculum Dilemma
The curriculum has it that every semester the kids are whipping through 12 assignments. These become exercises with very few creating something worthwhile, far less earning high grades, and a proportion failing or doing incredibly poorly (leading to increasing misbehavior tons of ISS, phone calls home). Evidence - Susan's classes. The curriculum is inherited as is the philosophy behind it. The rationale is this: Art One needs to be put through the paces so they can manipulate the media with ease by the time they reach Art 3/4. Blaming poor use of materials on poor preparation (exposure) in Art One leading to breadth, coverage.
This Wisdom weekend is especially exciting because we go into the inquiry of how the models we live in are all inherited, everything we measure against is created by someone else. The model is a prescribed formulae for being. We can step outside of that and create our own models, define ourselves because we can identify what is and what is not, then explore what is for me and what is possible - a pardigm shift.
The world we live in is one of survival. Getting through, getting by, kinda like that conversation about the curriculum - let's push the kids through and have them churn out work because they will be poorly prepared for what's ahead (more so it sounds as though the teacher will be frustrated at having to teach them what they need to know to do amazing work). If the conversation were really about the child then surely would it not go: what does the child truly want to learn and walk away with? Surely every child wants to do well, have something tangible in their hands that says "I am an extraordinary artist" "Wow! I created that" and "I am soooo taking art again" which to me reads - taking time, really learning what needs to be learned, and completing what was begun. I am commited to 100% success for all learners and I query where the old model has that available for everyone.
Don't ask me yet what I know about looking through the filter of 3 models: world, being, and language. It's all exciting and gives me access to something else beyond my range of vision.
Oh, by the way, it's raining all day today, rained most day yesterday and the heating is on - toasty warm.
Friday, every class had "one minute no talk time." I will think about how can I have them learn how to self-monitor, or what is it that has them more off task than on? What is it about the content or teaching that is not feeding them - do I need to build in share time in a talking about what you are learning time, like a mini-positive feedback thing?
The Curriculum Dilemma
The curriculum has it that every semester the kids are whipping through 12 assignments. These become exercises with very few creating something worthwhile, far less earning high grades, and a proportion failing or doing incredibly poorly (leading to increasing misbehavior tons of ISS, phone calls home). Evidence - Susan's classes. The curriculum is inherited as is the philosophy behind it. The rationale is this: Art One needs to be put through the paces so they can manipulate the media with ease by the time they reach Art 3/4. Blaming poor use of materials on poor preparation (exposure) in Art One leading to breadth, coverage.
This Wisdom weekend is especially exciting because we go into the inquiry of how the models we live in are all inherited, everything we measure against is created by someone else. The model is a prescribed formulae for being. We can step outside of that and create our own models, define ourselves because we can identify what is and what is not, then explore what is for me and what is possible - a pardigm shift.
The world we live in is one of survival. Getting through, getting by, kinda like that conversation about the curriculum - let's push the kids through and have them churn out work because they will be poorly prepared for what's ahead (more so it sounds as though the teacher will be frustrated at having to teach them what they need to know to do amazing work). If the conversation were really about the child then surely would it not go: what does the child truly want to learn and walk away with? Surely every child wants to do well, have something tangible in their hands that says "I am an extraordinary artist" "Wow! I created that" and "I am soooo taking art again" which to me reads - taking time, really learning what needs to be learned, and completing what was begun. I am commited to 100% success for all learners and I query where the old model has that available for everyone.
Don't ask me yet what I know about looking through the filter of 3 models: world, being, and language. It's all exciting and gives me access to something else beyond my range of vision.
Oh, by the way, it's raining all day today, rained most day yesterday and the heating is on - toasty warm.
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